![]() |
| The one on the left with stripped shorts is me at about 7 I think! I was that thin until around 7th or 8th grade. |
I don't know what happened, but somewhere along the way I started taking what the bullies told me to heart. Today my life is still full of bullies. These bullies are worse however, they are the voices of loved ones who say they are trying to help but all the while telling me I am not good enough. They are also voices that have been ingrained into my head.
So I wrote this letter to the bullies of today to tell them I am going back to how I was in grade school, where I did not tolerate being bullied.
Dear Bullies,
I am tired of letting you hold me back. I am tired of you controlling my future. You say you love me and want me to be happy, but every time I start to think I can change, you knock me back down by telling me it's too hard or I won't succeed.
I am done. I am strong! This last year has proven that to me and should have proven that to you as well. Was it easy? No, but I did it, I survived it and am better for it. I can't cut you completely out of my life, but you are done controlling it.
I have put the power and control in your hands for long enough! I know these next few years will be trying and tough and will test me in ways I've never been tested. However, isn't that why we believe we were sent to this earth, to be tested and tried?
Would life be easier if I just stayed the way I am? Yes, but than what kind of life would that be? Why settle for less than I am capable of? I know if I was to stay put, I would be miserable. Would it be easier if I just took out loans for schooling and another car? Yes, but that would increase our debt rather than decreasing it which is what we are aiming for. Would it be easier to not work full time while going to school? Yes, but some past decisions have taken that luxury away from us. Would it be easier to take less classes? Yes, but that would mean it would take longer to get the bachelors and than masters that I am going for and a greater possibility that I would not finish. So while your points are valid, I am not going to let your doubts in me stop me from reaching for my goals and knocking them out of the park.
Are you holding me back, because as everyone is aware, you don't feel Scott and I can do better together and you feel if I try to live to my fullest potential that I won't stick around? Well, you have no need to worry! I won't leave Scott. In fact, we are working together to help each other reach our fullest potential as individuals. Because of this I know that as a couple we will have unlimited possibilities! We will grow and learn together and be better for it! I do not have unrealistic expectations. I know that it will be hard! We may fail but we will fail together! Even if we don't end up where we aim to go we will still end up in a better place then we currently are.
You have always told me you think I am smart girl. Do you think I have not done my research on these decisions? Do you think I didn't weight the pros and cons? Do you think I didn't think about, pray about, talk with others, and pray more about these goals?
I know you think I will fail and will not be able to climb this mountain I have placed in front of me. But I know what is at the top. I know there is an amazing view with unlimited possibilities up there for Scott and I. And I am going to do all I can with Scott to get us there. We may stumble and fall, but we have each other and others surrounding us, cheering us on that will help us up, brush us off, wipe our tears, and then send us on our way.
In conclusion, I can do hard things. Scott can do hard things. Together we can do impossible things. This road will be difficult, no doubt about it. However, in the end it will be worth it. No matter how tough it gets, we will get through with the support from each other and those who truly support and the hope of a better future.



